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Headlines You May Have Missed Because of All the Shouting
by Roger White I realize you may find it hard to believe that any news anywhere in the world could possibly be weirder than our own little insane asylum of a presidential race, but yes, Virginia,...
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Did You Remember Siblings Day? Hmm?
by Roger White I generally make it a point to remember special occasions and days that have deep meaning to those around me. Ya know, like our kids’ birthdays, our anniversary, Bulk Trash Pickup...
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A Czech by Any Other Name–Or the Case of Consonant Dissonance
by Roger White It pains me deep-like when those near and dear to me are hurting. And lately, the folks in my oldest sister’s family are having a bit of an identity crisis. You see, sis Kathy...
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How the Interwebs ‘Mowed Down’ the Postal Service
by Roger White My old friend Gary, whom I’ve been best buds with since the early days of the LBJ Administration, recently retired after almost 40 years with the US Postal Service. Forty years of...
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The Squirrel Who Came in from the Cold
by Roger White My spidey sense tells me of late that the critters in our attic are not Rocky Raccoon and his pals this time around but creatures far more cunning and insidious: squirrels. Yes, those...
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Phil at the Alamo and Starbucks on the Moon. Really.
by Roger White So have you been reading lately about the papyrus scroll uncovered by some Harvard professor a few years back? The prof claimed this scroll proved that Jesus had a wife. Yeah. There...
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Texas President Norris Asks U.S. to Reconsider ‘Texit’
by Roger White DATELINE: University Park, Texas; November 16, 2019. A scant six months after Texas was granted full secession rights by U.S. President Hillary Clinton and Congress, Texas President...
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That’s Right, I Invented Tokémon Woah.
by Roger White It hit me—almost literally—the other day just how pervasive this Pokémon Go craze is when my daughter yelled at me to stop the car (in the middle of the road, mind you) as I was...
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Are We Not Men? We Are Creatures! (Of Habit)
by Roger White I sometimes wonder when I’m in private places—like making my choice-of-urinal decision in the men’s room at work or standing buck nekkid in my closet pondering the day’s wardrobe...
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One Flew Over the Dentist’s Chair, or Butch Cavity & the Periodontal Kid
by Roger White Having been raised in front of our family’s trusty old TV set and in the darkened imitation-butter-smelling theaters of suburban Anytown USA, I often find myself comparing personal...
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Dreaming of Better Days–Or Reasonable Canadian Real Estate
by Roger White Sometimes dreams are just dreams—simple brain-dumps of the day’s events, snippets of the recent odd encounter, short reels of hazy memories, a sweeping up of the mental flotsam bobbing...
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That’s It. We’re Toast. Finito. Game Over. Unless…
by Roger White I knew it. I just knew it. We’re doomed. No, I’m not referring to the results of some recent political goings-on you may have heard about (electoral college be forever damned)....
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I Give You the Cheetoh’s “Beltway to Heaven”
by Roger White Oh, my dear discombobulated disciples. Oh, my concerned cosmic cadets. Oh. Oh. … and another oh. If you’re of my ilk and persuasion, these last few days have been nothing short of the...
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Help, I’m Suddenly Single, and I Can’t Get Up, or Down, or Anything!
by Roger White Operator: “911, what’s your emergency?” TOS: “Well, um, my wife and kids are gone. I’m not sure what to do.” Operator: “Gone? How long have they been missing?” TOS: “Uh, well. They’re...
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Wake Up Uncle Dad: It’s Mashup Time Again
Calm. Simmer down, people. I know very well that it’s been quite the while since we forayed into the Movie Mashup milieu. And I know that you know, based on the influx of cards and letters and...
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Lit Lovers Rejoice! Sir Archie Ferndoodle Rides Again.
by Roger White Fellow time/space voyagers and other occasional devotees of “This Old Blouse,” I am more tickled than a...
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When the Bra Comes Off, the Day Is Done
by Roger White So I saw something on Facebook the other day posted by a friend of a Facebook friend’s mother, who is the...
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And Now, United Airlines’ New Theme Song!
Announcer voice-over “In light of United Airlines, shall we say, unique passenger accommodation policies, here with the company’s new theme, is United CEO Oscar Munoz:” Munoz (with bat in hand) (to...
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Ya Wanted More Fernie, Ya Got More Fernie
by Roger White Well, gang, it seems that the literary stylings of my old compadre Dr. Archie Ferndoodle have truly struck...
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Wanna Know Who You Really Are? Spit Here.
by Roger White So the wife finally convinced me to do this ancestry DNA thing you’ve probably heard or read about. Ya...
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